How do you have a ceremony that runs smoothly?
How will the ushers know how to usher your family out?
How will your musicians know when to play for your unity candle?
How will you know when to respond to your officiate?
How can you get your maid of honor to take your bouquet and fix your muddled train?
See you really do need to practice.
Make a program- an order of details of the ceremony. Even if you don’t want one for your guests, your officiate, coordinator, musicians, readers and ushers will need one to follow. It should include the names of your musical pieces, readings and liturgy and who is intended to play, sing or speak.
Decide every detail before with your officiate and coordinator. Trust me you do not want advice from your Aunt Ruth about how to walk in or from your soon-to-be mother in law about where the men should go. No one will agree, it will add time and confusion to your rehearsal and no one will remember what you ultimately decided on. Do it before and write it down. Now is the time for a little detail. We do not suggest that you obsess about your wedding for a year before, but we do suggest you give a few things some time before your big day.
Get everyone there on time and promise them if they pay attention (harder with adults than kindergarteners) that you will reward them with a drink and dinner after.
Have your coordinator…
1- Set your bridal party up in their places at the front.
2- Guide them how to recess/leave (and inform them where they will go after the ceremony)
3- Line the bridal party up in their pre-ceremony places at the back (guys, girls, children, parents)
4- Inform participants about entry order and instructions to reach the front.
5-Run through your entire ceremony from processional songs to recessional
6- Include details like hand offs, microphones, when musicians/readers should come forward
7- Skip the words of the ceremony and the I-do’s (It’ll be better tomorrow)
8- Give your officiate your marriage license and your wedding rings to your coordinator or maid-of-honor.
9- Give everyone directions to dinner.
10- Relax and enjoy your friends and family. Don’t drink too much- there are going to be a lot of pictures tomorrow.
Top 6 Ways to Avoid Fainting
- Don't lock your knees, keep them slightly bent
- Don't spend the night before the wedding getting to know Johnny Walker and Jim Beam
- Don't hold the wedding in a sauna
- Don't tie it too tight. No one will notice that you look 1/2 inch slimmer as you crash to the floor
- Don't be afraid to take a seat for 30 seconds
- Breathe
How much your guests drink depends on your crowd. Take into account what your friends and family like and whether or not they are Irish.
You do not need to offer every drink, nor do we suggest that you offer an open bar for more than 2 hours total. (Nothing says ‘classy’ like hurling off the balcony while dressed to the nines.)
We suggest that you do not open the bar until after the ceremony. Groomsmen are notorious for loading up and trying to get completely Kennedy’d. When you do open the bar make sure that appetizers are available. (Bread, crackers and other alcohol absorbent foods are always a good idea).
A convenient time to switch from an open bar is when your meal is served. Guests can be seated with their cocktails and then offered beer and wine with their meal. Close the bar while guests fill their tummies, guests are less likely to notice and if they do the wonderful taste that is free food will help alleviate their aggravation. If you wish to open the bar later make it clear that you will authorize the bartender to do so. Survey your crowd, some people are capable of governing themselves and some are not, those who are not will become blatantly obvious to you the longer you wait. Don’t jeopardize your event or your guest’s safety. It will take one hour for your liver to remove one unit of alcohol. That’s 4 hours if you had 4 drinks! It is wise to stop all alcohol 1-2 hours before your guests leave.
What about what to buy? Many sites allow or ask you to purchase your own alcohol.
As a helpful guide for a 3-5 hour event...
assume 3-4 drinks pp
50% beer
20% wine
20% liquor
10% will not drink
(This will vary depending on crowd)
We strongly suggest a no shot policy.
Bottle of wine = ~6 glasses Champagne toast (1/3 full) = 10glasses
1 Keg = ~140 servings
We suggest you purchase bottled beer in 6packs usually liquor stores will return unopened 6packs (as well as bottles of wine and liquor) as long as their labels are not wet.
Cash Bars: Really? If I invited you to my home and charged you $5 for your wine you’d never speak to me again. How badly do you need alcohol that you are not willing to pay for it? We have planned many classy non-alcoholic events. If you are very concerned about several of your guests (the marines, the Irish, your aunt slosh) consider limiting what’s available.
A note about tip jars: If you are paying for the alcohol you should also include gratuity and it is therefore not appropriate for the bartender to display a tip jar. It’s insulting to you. Confirm this beforehand with your licensed bartender.
Click here for a convenient online calc supply list.
(latter picture courtesy of Verge Photography)
How do you have a ceremony that runs smoothly?
